Today I was reminded of the importance of communication. This blog is a wonderful way for me to communicate to my loved ones. There will be days where I just don't have the time or energy to provide updates to everyone. The blog is a glimpse into my mind, a glimmer of my fears but a wide open picture to my thanks, gratitude and positive feelings of hope.
I have quickly realized the need for me to advocate for myself. It begins with the front line administrative staff at my doctor's offices. I made a call today to the secretary at Dr Hentschel's office. What a kind lady. I apologized for my emotions when we spoke on Thursday, I relayed to her my appreciation that we were able to re-arrange my appointments so I could attend Paul Chambers funeral. She was familiar with Paul and knew what a remarkable man he was.
She let me know that the gallium scan results had not been sent back yet but that Dr. Hentschel was on-call this week and could possibly have them by tonight and often makes calls after dinner. She also said that I have been booked to see both Dr. McCarron the Oncologist and Dr. Stevens a Hematologist on Thursday, April 17th at the Cancer Centre. They may possibly try to have me come in earlier but the biopsy results from tomorrow's surgery often take a week at least to arrive. Coordinating appointments to coincide with test results seems to be important. The onus I believe falls upon myself to ensure that all parties are communicating with each other as I learned last week when it was missed that I was having this biopsy. Communication is crucial, advocating and speaking up for what I need will be key. Building strong relationships will also allow me to be seen as a person and not another patient.
I give thanks today first to my parents. Seeing them this past weekend was something I needed to do. Having them live a bit farther away is harder for them I am sure than for me. But I always feel their presence. I am grateful for BBM in that I have constant communication with both of them when I just need to vent, share a bit of news or have them check in on me. I am relieved that they will be able to be here for part of this week to give some support to the kids and Jason. Thank you to my dear friend and colleague whom I had a lovely lunch with Sunday. Her gift to me was a cactus plant. This plant is meant to withstand hardship, rough elements, will grow anywhere and requires little maintenance and it will still survive. A metaphor that I will be able to stand tall and grow in all terrible circumstances.
I am also grateful to colleagues for their cards, gift cards for a meal and a beautiful outdoor plant that arrived on my doorstep. Jason's parents for their meals, muffins, cookies, love for my kids and all while facing their own difficulties in life. Their unconditional love for us is incredible. My Aunt for her visit and strength she gives me. I wouldn't be able to get through some days without her. A kind Itinerant teacher who will be leading my reading group for three days this week so those students continue in their learning and to my husband, Jason who is the most incredible source of strength for me.