Wednesday, September 17, 2014

I Can't Wait!

Hummingbird today in our backyard
As I sat in my backyard today in the sunshine, watching the birds and the butterflies. The breeze was blowing and the temperature was perfect. If I closed my eyes I could imagine and pretend just for a second that I was completely without pain, fatigue or worry.

Today is a good day.

I am beginning to gain some strength back from this second to last treatment. Typically around the Wednesday I start to feel not quite so flu-like and although I continue to deal with the fatigue, I able to face each day with a bit more energy. As I sat outside today I began to dream and envision all the amazing things that we will be able to do again once I am back on the road to recovery and I can't wait.

It is so easy to take small little things for granted. Very simple chores, outings, errands, visits. Something I would accomplish one hundred times a year ago now is such a big big deal. Tonight, feeling buoyed and energized after my nap I proclaimed to Jason, Cam and Jordan. It's half price burger night at Casey's we're going out for dinner! Do you know how long it has been since the four of us have gone out for dinner together? I am not even sure if we have since I have started treatment. Jordan was so excited, she put her arm through mine in the parking lot and said "Mommy is back!" We laughed and joked together, no phones out at the table. Just enjoying each other. Jordan drew a pie graph on the table, and said this small slice was Mommy feeling good and the rest of the pie I am normally in bed. We all talked about how the piece of the pie is just going to keep getting bigger where I am feeling good. there are so many things we can't wait to be able to do again. Here are a few that we talked about tonight, I am adding some of my own personal goals that I can't wait to do!

I can't wait to.....
- go canoe camping in Algonquin Park in August, possibly going back to High Falls, the kids favourite part of the park
- winter camping in February Check! Feb 6-8
- camping with our friends in the summer - try Arrowhead Park, back to Grundy Lake
- dancing at Abstract on Fridays with the girls again Check! April 29
- hiking a trail at one of the parks we camp at - Check! June 11-13
- going for more than just a walk around the block - Check! December 7
- riding our bikes together around Macgregor Point - Check! June 11-13
- cross country skiing up in Southampton
- camping at Cyprus Lake and hiking the Grotto
- birdwatching at Point Pelee, Lake Erie
- ziplining at Lake Erie
- running up the stairs without having to hold the bannister Check!
- dance parties with the yurting group out on our deck at midnight
- getting through more than one day without having to have a nap - Check - some days
- sleeping through the night without waking up Check!
- grocery shopping or shopping at a mall - Check!
- walk around NYC or Chicago all day long, two of my favourite cities
- return to work at school with such a great staff
- be able to work all day, drive the kids to their sports and not think about being tired
- watching all of Cam's hockey games and going to tournaments with our hockey parent families! Check!
- many more trips to the schoolhouse, to shop, eat, drink and be merry!!! (Dancing in the kitchen?)

One treatment left, several important appointments coming up in October. A whole lot of rest and recovery ahead of me. But I am getting there, one day at a time. I wouldn't have been able to do it without all of you.

I can't wait!

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