Showing posts with label Lymph nodes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lymph nodes. Show all posts
Friday, March 21, 2014
Biopsy
Once again, I need to share how incredible my experiences have been with the professionals at both St Mary's Hospital and Grand River Hospital. I received a call from a Radiology nurse at St Mary's today so that she could walk me through the procedure that I am having on Monday morning. The core needle biopsy will take samples from the mass in my chest in the mediastinum area, this is where lymph nodes are located between the hearts and lungs. After answering all my questions and reassuring me, I felt so much better about what I am facing. The results have been marked "rush" and she believes that I should have the results by the end of the week. I understand it takes one or two days for the pathologist to test the sample and you have to leave it for 48 hours etc. These things take time and I would rather that they have a conclusive diagnosis than have to go back and take another sample in order to have a firm diagnosis. So we wait again. Having these appointments, give me something to focus on to get to, another day to cross off that gets me closer to an answer and more importantly, a plan to treat this and move forward in this battle.
Saturday, March 15, 2014
Worry like I have never felt before
Wednesday, March 13, 2014. Probably a date that will stand out in my life for me. February 12, 2013 is also a day where my strength was tested. Haven't I gone through enough hardship? Do I really deserve for this to be happening to me?
I received a call from my doctor's office while I was in the shower, Cam came in smiling and said "you're a popular person" and gave me a message that I needed to call the office right back. The smile dropped from my face, the lump re-appeared in my throat and a feeling of panic came over me. Shaking I called the office back and was told that Dr Tahira needed to see me today and that I could come in the morning and just wait for her to fit me in between patients. I texted Jason who was at an appointment with Jordan. The minutes crawled by until he got home.
As soon as Dr Tahira came into the office. I knew. She sat down and looked me in the eye and said "I'm sorry, it's not good". I was strangely calm. She explained that the ct scan had unfortunately shown a small mass in the anterior section of the mediastinum and that there were "many" enlarged lymph nodes through my chest. The recommendation was that I have a guided CT scan or guided ultrasound biopsy to confirm lymphoma.
It was somewhere around there that I began to crumble. Slowly dissolve into a haze of disbelief. Really? This is really happening to me? Through my tears, she explained the only way they can really know it's cancer was to do the biopsy. Jason asked whether the lymph nodes in my chest could be due to infection, she shook her head no. She said many times, over the course of our conversation, we don't know.
Her compassion began to show during the past appointments. It just shows how important it is to have a relationship with your doctor. I have been missing out on that but maybe just maybe this is the beginning of a positive one. I am all about relationships so it has been incredibly difficult for me not to have that. I shared my increasing and overwhelming feelings of anxiety with her and she supportively prescribed me some meds to help me get through the next few weeks which undoubtedly will still be wrought with uncertainty and worry.
I received a call from my doctor's office while I was in the shower, Cam came in smiling and said "you're a popular person" and gave me a message that I needed to call the office right back. The smile dropped from my face, the lump re-appeared in my throat and a feeling of panic came over me. Shaking I called the office back and was told that Dr Tahira needed to see me today and that I could come in the morning and just wait for her to fit me in between patients. I texted Jason who was at an appointment with Jordan. The minutes crawled by until he got home.
As soon as Dr Tahira came into the office. I knew. She sat down and looked me in the eye and said "I'm sorry, it's not good". I was strangely calm. She explained that the ct scan had unfortunately shown a small mass in the anterior section of the mediastinum and that there were "many" enlarged lymph nodes through my chest. The recommendation was that I have a guided CT scan or guided ultrasound biopsy to confirm lymphoma.
It was somewhere around there that I began to crumble. Slowly dissolve into a haze of disbelief. Really? This is really happening to me? Through my tears, she explained the only way they can really know it's cancer was to do the biopsy. Jason asked whether the lymph nodes in my chest could be due to infection, she shook her head no. She said many times, over the course of our conversation, we don't know.
Her compassion began to show during the past appointments. It just shows how important it is to have a relationship with your doctor. I have been missing out on that but maybe just maybe this is the beginning of a positive one. I am all about relationships so it has been incredibly difficult for me not to have that. I shared my increasing and overwhelming feelings of anxiety with her and she supportively prescribed me some meds to help me get through the next few weeks which undoubtedly will still be wrought with uncertainty and worry.
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